back again.

ok..im back again....i feel lyk closing down my janmini.blogspot cuz it has completely no privacy le...nvm nvm dis shall b my private blog..where less ppl will read and i can share it with ppl im really closed to only....

dis few days has been very happy days with baby.we went out..he helped me with buying my camera...went to eat dinner with mummy and god-daddy...it was really fun :D
im gona miss him so much when he go ns...

alot of ppl has been trying to contact me but i just refuse to ans the calls and msges.i can't carry on anymore cuz my tyre of strength has punctured.my stay there has "expired" and i dun feel fresh there anymore.perhaps i shall find another place where i can renew my passion and commitment.somewhere where i feel belonged to and wun feel left out.hopefully can find new ppl hu are at the same wavelength as me and wun say jokes dat leave me clueless but still have to laugh along with the rest.somewhere where i dun need to carry my angel mask.where i can b my rowdy and loud self and ppl will still take notice of me and not see through me and laugh along with me.somewhere where i dun need to fight so hard for attention so as not to feel left out.it's lyk being there for almost 2 years and i still dun really feel belonged to the grp.i hate it when ppl leave then dey start to suck up and try to get the ppl back again.i guess i've always felt left out and yes u can just say it's my fault for not voicing it out.but hey it's also ur job to make everybody feel belonged to wad.sometimes im just sick of all the hypocrisy.

sigh im feeling so low.i feel lyk just giving myself up le.it's so hard having to fight obstacles everyday.i hate dis sucked up thing called Life.how i wish time could just stop at dat moment right there..yes DAT moment...i hate it when time progresses and everything changes...most of the time its for the worse.my life is extremely cursed and i wish i didn't need to live in the first place.im afraid i'd bring the curse to ppl whom im close to..too...